assholic | Open Post

He didn't have the faintest clue on how it worked other than in books and movies. Sadly, he never even had a conversation with Allison when she got hitched other than agreeing to go to the wedding and the details of where it was and where he needed to pick up his tux. Sir Reginald Hargreeves wasn't one to share stories either, only alluding to being widowed.

Yet her response didn't make Diego feel worse, he respected what Jessica educated him on. It also made it better that she called him cute. The kiss was a final push to getting him to calm down which worked perfectly for what she asked him.

"Us. Somewhere that nobody is trying to kill you. Where you don't have reminders of all the shitty things that you've had to deal with. A place that has some room for more." He caressed where his hand reached on Jessica, a balm for him as much as it might be for her.

The idea of having a family was something he secretly wanted but never truly knowing when it would be possible. He didn't want to end up like Allison, losing a custody battle. Relationships didn't last but he'd found his soulmate and couldn't help giving that some thought.

She sat up a bit more on her knees, moving so that her head was more even with him as she sat there. She kissed him back, then rested her forehead against his. Anyone else would have called it nuzzling, but she was a hardass, so she wouldn't- for now. She did, however, lean into the way he touched her, opening her eyes for a moment and seeing the scar against the side of his head, a reminder of a close call. She kissed it, then drew back enough to look at him. "I'm one of the freaks, Romeo. Someone is always going to put the blame for something that happened to them or a family member by some incident or another on me. Or be afraid I'm contagious. Or just afraid. I have roots here, sort of. I have a job I'm not shit at, contacts. Support for both of us if we need it."

But that wasn't what he was really asking. Not when he had that soft tone, when he made that future wish. "But... that doesn't mean I'm tied to this building. Or even this area of town. It's cheap and it was available. And for while I needed it, it did what I needed it to do."

Her hand came up to let her finger curve along the edge of his ear, tracing around it before she moved back a bit, letting her hands smooth down the jacket. "I like the idea of new things. For us. I like that I have someone I want to make plans with."

"Don't say that."

Not everyone had been a fan of the Umbrella Academy. Kids can be cruel and they were to Ben and Klaus whose powers were on the scary side. Nobody was stupid enough to pick a fight with Allison or Diego and Luther was too much of a goody-two-shoes to get baited into a fight when their father was alive. Only Diego had the power of picking a fight with Number One.

It took a lot of discipline not to stand up for Ben or Klaus when they were called names. The kids didn't have to contend with getting bullied at school but when they were out for public events, Diego often would get in trouble for losing his temper. His stutter also had made him a freak. He couldn't stand for anyone calling Jessica one.

"You're not a freak. People are assholes."

He simmered and listened to Jessica go on. She had valid points on the rest and it felt like he'd made a bad call until she took a breath. It was as if saying things out loud had put them in a different perspective for her. Diego relaxed to where she wouldn't feel any tension if she leaned against him.

"I can put in the work. On a new place. I even agreed to work for Luke so it'll be 3 jobs I'll contribute with. 4 if I give private classes at the dojo." The puppy dog look was in full effect, hopeful that Jessica would truly consider leaving the one bedroom in Hell's Kitchen.

He could use that look for so much evil. She would merrily go traipsing into a lot of things for that look. It was his eagerness she needed to rein in, his willingness to throw himself entirely into what he thought she needed or wanted, when all that mattered to her now was him. "Please don't. For a variety of reasons, but for the most selfish one being that I want to see you and be with you, and that's going to be hard if all you're doing is working. We're a team now, Diego. We're supposed to do this together. That means," she said, chiding him as she slid her hands up along his thighs, then used her grip to lever herself up to her feet, where she held her hands out for him to stand with her if he wanted to, "that to work together, you need to talk to me. I know the gist of your past, but not all of it, but I don't know what could make you feel like you couldn't just come tell me that this place didn't feel good for you, for whatever reason, and you wanted to find something that did. Together."

It hurt a little, but she shoved that aside, because this moment wasn't really about her. He'd gotten himself dressed up, then worked up over just the thought of asking her something. It hurt that he felt he couldn't just ask her, but those glimpses into his past hadn't shown a lot of healthy opening up. Not that her own had been much better, but his lack of... confidence, if that was even the right word, about himself and his worth and how much stock he had with her in that regard... She really wanted to kill his dad. "This place doesn't exactly hold a lot of great memories for me. A lot of blood and ghosts, sure." Kilgrave had been here. Some part of her thought she was taking it back by staying, but maybe that's why his voice was always able to find its way to hiss into her ear.

Putting herself in his shoes, she tried to see how she'd feel about moving into a place with him where he'd had past lovers over. Where he'd rolled around with them in the bed they shared. Where memories of them lingered. Diego would feel a thrum of jealousy tremble along that bond. Oh, yeah. She could definitely understand why he'd asked. Just not why he was so nervous. "Did you... did you think I'd be mad about it? Mad at you?"

He stood up when she had, slipping his arms around her as if they were going to slow dance. There was a vulnerable look on his features that Jessica might have seen before. It was one previously reserved only for Grace. He feared rejection and disappointing his soulmate.

Yet he understood her response. It was fair and nothing she hadn't already said. More than that, Diego didn't disagree with it. However, there were two sides and he had a difficult time explaining himself which worsened as Jessica voiced a quiet disappointment.

"I am," he protested just as quietly. It took him a second to continue, awkward and anxious over being called out. "Trying to talk to you. I..." Diego swallowed thickly. Slowly, he picked up his gaze and gave her a pleading look. "I'm not from here. What right do I have to want you to pick up and leave?"

She said what he'd felt and couldn't get into words. "There's a whole life you've had here. A lot more pain than happiness but it's still your place. I don't wanna keep going to the past but I don't know how to talk about a future." Diego had nearly given up on having one before his world ended. Now it was all he thought about after meeting Jessica.

"I didn't think you'd be mad. It was more... you might not take me seriously. I'm not bringing much to the table so why would you. I wanted to show you that I'm bringing something to the table. That's all." He hadn't gotten to worrying about her safety or dealing with disgruntled clients or exes.

"You-," she cut off, looking at him with an expression of such sadness, she felt the tears pricking her eyes. She closed them, then did the only thing she could think of doing in that moment that would cut through whatever pain he'd been through. That could get past all the barbs and jibes and digs he'd suffered through growing up. Through all the people that had failed him so poorly. She focused on that bond between them. On the links that wound through her into him, that vibrated with every intense thing they felt, every pain and joy, and she sent him love. She focused on what she felt every time she looked at him, and she forced it down into that bond until it didn't just hum with it, it shook.

"I love you," she said, voice soft as she opened her eyes, "but I want to smack whoever made you think that you don't bring much to the table. You bring you, Diego. You bring me my other half. God, you bring me love, and I didn't think I'd ever have that. And you think asking me to move is wrong? That you don't have a right?"

Her hands cupped his face, those tears shedding slowly as she looked at him. "I have no future without you, Diego. I have nothing without you. This might not be the world you were born into, but have you ever thought that maybe it's the one you should have been? That something stole you from it? If you matched with me here... maybe this is just as much your world as mine. So, let's make it our world."

His heart sank as water started collecting in her eyes. Hurting her was the last thing he wanted. The possibility of it alone had been what kept him on the fence about saying anything. Now he clearly had and Diego nearly wished he'd kept his big mouth shut until she opened her eyes and spoke.

The tears weren't from something he did to her, it was empathy over how he viewed himself. A burden. Disappointment. Not enough. She'd told him that she loved him and he never doubted she meant it but he really didn't believe he could be loved. Tears rolled down his cheeks, dampening her hands on his face.

"I love you." His voice sounded hoarse with emotion, cracking slightly. "I belong wherever you are. Okay?" It was the best he could string together in agreement. No one had ever made any declaration the way Jessica had. How many times had he felt someone else was the world to him, only to never have it reciprocated? Enough times that he lived a life in the shadows.

Jessica brought him out of the darkness and into a world he only dreamed about. Talking in an emotional state was something Diego had never been able to do. He would make an effort to talk when emotions weren't so raw. She deserved that much. In the moment, he dipped his head to capture her lips and pour everything into a kiss if she allowed him.

Did she want to say more? Always. She'd keep telling him how much he was worth every day until it sunk in. But she'd seen that stuttering image replay in his mind over and over in a lot of flashbacks and she knew how hard words could be for him. So she slid her arms over around his shoulders, leaning into him as he kissed her.

Well, clearly she had two full time jobs now. One was being a P.I., and the other was rebuilding the self esteem that should have been built by the people who'd taken him in. She might not fully get the whole robot mom thing, but Grace's image had a light behind her in his memories and she was going to stop even thinking of the bot as a walking toaster. Grace had been... well, his saving grace. Machinery or not, she owed the memory of who she'd been to Diego more than flippant thoughts.

So she kissed him and kept sending as much of herself through that bond as she could. She adored him. Hell, she hadn't been able to give up drinking for Trish. Or herself. It wasn't even that she gave it up. She just... didn't need it when she had something in her life that made it worth waking up for. Maybe that's what she'd been missing. She kissed him and held him, then, with wet still on her cheeks, she mumbled against his lips, "Where'd you get the suit from? It's nice."

He liked that she was the talker between them but also worried in time, as it had in the past, that he'd wear her down. Jessica seemed more understanding and patient than any of his past relationships. She was also his soulmate. Diego believed what she told him; maybe this was always where he was meant to be. Maybe he'd get better in time and break the chains of his past.

There was more than words from Jessica. Her devotion didn't go unnoticed by the change from her drinking and even smiling. She was happy which wasn't often in the memories he saw since she'd lost her family and one relationship after another. It was why Diego found it so important to keep her happy because it was also the happiest he'd ever been.

A hand had cupped her cheek and he wiped some of the dampness from her cheek, breathing her in after the kiss for a second before responding. "Rand. We're about the same size. Ward keeps adding to his closet and Danny doesn't want them. I'm just a shoe size bigger but fortunately there was a pair that ran big. There are a couple of more suits, even a pair of suspenders, in my bag. In the bedroom."

He should probably get those out so they didn't wrinkle but Diego was happy where he stood with Jessica and didn't move. His hand moved off of her face and wrapped lightly around her frame.

Eventually she'd get him to figure out that past relationships didn't matter. Not anymore. The women who'd barely loved him and left him had been idiots. The people that had seen him as a thing and not the man he was... well. People were fucking assholes.

He wiped away some of that wetness and gave her a look that felt like he was squeezing her heart from the inside. His inability to see his own self worth made her heart break. It made her hate the people that had been in his world that had put that there. "We can get you shoes, if you want. But I like this on you. You wear it better than Rand."

Her fucks about his wrinkled clothes were up there with his, and when he touched her, she just leaned into him, resting her head against his, swaying a little with him as if there was music somewhere that gave her a reason to.

"I'm good with this pair." They were a little tight but Diego learned a long time ago from his father that good leather would form. In truth, he couldn't help but feel like she didn't need to pay for everything that he needed. ...He needed to stop worrying that she'd get fed up with him like every lover before her.

It wasn't as if he could imagine getting tired of Jessica. There were a few relationships, including his last, where he held feelings that just weren't returned. She didn't give him that notion regardless of how new their relationship was. Diego exhaled calmly through a soft smile.

"I think you're just not used to seeing me wear something that isn't black," he teased while moving to the imaginary music. The suit was light gray with a blue button down underneath and a tie that matched the suit. Black leather shoes and a black leather belt rounded out the outfit that he was ready to get out of for the night.

"I like you in black. You pull off the whole dangerously sexy thing well. But grey's nice too..." She smoothed her hand down the lapel, moving with him as they swayed. The tension that had been in him since he'd walked in the door was gone, and they were just there. The two of them. He looked at her and she swore she actually could see love there.

Diego made her feel things that she'd long since given up hope on. It wasn't just the love, it was the acceptance. He looked at her and didn't find things he wanted to change about her. He wasn't trying to fit her into some idea in his head of what she should be. He saw her and loved her anyway.

Her fingers wrapped around the tie, giving a light tug on it. "You always look pretty to me."

His eyes stayed fixed on hers with an occasional glance down to her lips. He found himself questioning what she could possibly see in him when Jessica met him with looks that left nothing to the imagination. Being wanted was all he'd ever dreamed of but could never find a voice to say and she seemed to know it on a level that no one else had. Not even Grace.

"Glad to hear it." The feeling was conveyed in his tone and his gaze. Diego wrapped his arms a little more snug around her. "You're always beautiful to me. I don't want to ever know what it's like to spend a day without you." He nuzzled the tip of his nose at the end of hers.

The silent music continued and he kept leading Jessica in the slow dance.

"Not one day, huh?" She was smiling as she said that, nudging his nose back with hers before she turned it into a soft, grazing brush of her lips to his. She was beginning to understand the phrase 'falling in love' because of him. Being around him had her feeling like she was constantly in the air, falling, flipping, but there was absolutely no fear about it because he was with her. He'd catch her. Or she'd catch him. Either way, it was clear by that look on his face that she wasn't the only one feeling that consuming flame that flickered between them.

"Wanna go look around for a bit tomorrow for some place for us?" Concessions. She could make concessions for him. She could change things that weren't important to cling to for him to make him feel like he fit in her life. Because as of that moment they'd touched, she had no life without him.

"I can barely get through half a day, definitely not a whole one."

The closeness had soothed all the anxiety he'd been riddled with that day, worried about demanding too much and changing her life even more than he already had. She didn't need to suggest they look for places so soon but Jessica would see him light up at the offer like a kid on Christmas morning.

Not that he knew what those Christmases were like outside of movies. That might change with the new universe he belonged to.

"I'll even wear the suit and tie again," he offered while continuing the slow dance. "I've got a few more you can choose from." Diego might have to figure out how to hold up his end of the bargain on the jobs he signed up for but would do whatever it took to keep Jessica happy.

"I like you in jeans. They show off that very nice ass you have," she answered, smiling at knowing that he meant every word of what he said. About not wanting to go a whole day, about being willing to dress up again. He wasn't the only one. The thought of not checking in with him at least once during the day didn't sit right with her, which considering her normal track record with anyone close to her, was kind of laughable. She'd gone months without talking to Trish. Days, if not weeks without talking to Malcolm, and that was only because he was so close to her business. Not talking to Diego at least once a day would send her into a tailspin.

It didn't hurt that she woke up with him every morning. Both of them tangled up together, one wrapped around the other, or both facing each other and wound together. Things she found too clingy with anyone else, she decided worked best with him. No, she wouldn't be able to go a whole day without him. She also wouldn't be able to sleep properly without him anymore. He'd become her substitute for alcohol. He stood between her and the worst of her nightmares. There was no room for Kilgrave or her past when he was touching her.

"You got something in mind? For a new place, that is. Just a home-home, or a place where we can do stuff for work and whatever?"

That compliment prompted him to grin widely but drop his gaze, smiling shyly for a fleeting second before returning a quip. "Here I thought your favorite was me naked but jeans would probably be a better idea if we're in public." Diego was a sucker for getting Jessica to smile and was also well aware of her jealous streak (which he liked more than he put into words).

"I think we keep home and work separate so me walking around naked for you doesn't have the chance of an accidental audience," he concluded with his grin shifting to a smirk. "Maybe we can find something with office space downstairs and an apartment above it?" Diego wasn't sure if that would be affordable or more expensive.

"What do you want?"

Depending on where in the city they looked, it was doable. Brownstone living would be perfect, but that would be way above either of their budgets. Didn't mean she couldn't look at warehouses that were converted to working and living spaces. Knowing a bit of what he wanted would help her narrow down where they looked. Probably closer to the docks. Closer to the edge of the living part of town and more into the working part. She was okay with that. "As long as you agree to walk around naked in it, I'm happy to facilitate finding a place where you'll do that."

They were still swaying, shuffling feet, staying close together as she lifted a hand to play through the very short, bristly strands of hair at the back of his head. Finger pads got tickled, and nails tickled back. "If you're okay with living in a basement of a gym, I'm hoping you'll be okay with a converted warehouse. It can be set up so part of it can be an office for me, and the other part can be a gym or training area for you. The upper part can be where we do all those devious, naked things."

"I like how you think," he commented in response to her idea about a converted warehouse. His fingertips lightly raked where they reached at the small of her back, still leading the silent slow dance. He enjoyed the scratch of her nails and mimicked the touch unconsciously.

His mind thought of the space being one they could live comfortably in and plan for a future. "So you'll be walking around naked too. I think a nice big walk-in shower but also a tub we can soak in. Then a big bed we can... sleep in." Among other things. The unsaid insinuation was heavy in his gaze and drop in octave when he spoke.

She let out a snort, but she was grinning as they shuffled, and he had that tone that dipped down and made something low in her belly tighten, then flip. "I could be talked into forgetting to put something on when I wake up. A big bed, huh?"

Jess was already starting to mentally pick out places she'd seen that weren't that dissimilar. What would work best, what wouldn't. A lot of warehouse conversions had basically an entire open floor plan, so that gave them a lot of space to work with. To piece together how they wanted in a way that worked best for him. She already knew that there'd be a section, if not a whole wall, dedicated to targets and knives. The fact that he wanted a tub to soak in had her smiling, glad he was thinking of indolent things, things he wanted, so she could get a better picture.

"Sunk into the floor or raised on a platform?"

He was relatively sure he'd do anything to get her to smile. Seeing Jessica light up had become a favorite thing, enough to have made him anxious a whole day over having a necessary conversation. All that anxiety had melted away and seemed like ancient history as they swayed to talk of their new place.

"A bed sunk into the floor? Personally, I like having height for leverage." He obviously was no longer thinking of just sleeping and didn't think about the tub as an option, having only ever seen traditional bathtubs. Diego pictured the upstairs solely for them but would have a small number of knives along with easy access to his full arsenal downstairs.

Maybe a defunct fire station would work if there was a way to baby proof the pole. Not that his mind ventured past the converted warehouse or the question of 'sunk' or 'raised'.

"There's loft conversions. Converted warehouses and lofts are hoity toity in Brooklyn and near the Park, but if we find something bigger and closer to the water, it'll likely need more work to put into living condition, meaning a better price." See? She was thinking ahead. Planning for funds that they could use wisely. It was a first for her. She didn't have a 401k or life insurance. She had been clinging a lot to her existence as just being there and trying to make it day to day.

Since he'd come into her life, she found she had plans. Dreams. A want for the future. "Loft or raised bed, then. We could have a bathroom inset that has a walk in shower and then a soaking tub. Maybe we can talk to Danny about having some of his nerds come in and tech up a few things under the guise of you being more accessible for any work he needs or for me to be able to store things like that whatever we dug out of me. Make it sound like it's to his benefit." Hey, Danny was mind numbingly rich. And generous. She'd make sure that she did enough for him, or let Diego give enough of his time to him to make them both feel comfortable that it was paid back in barter. Making fun of the younger man was one thing, but taking advantage of him wouldn't sit right.

"Danny," Diego repeated with a nod while pensive. He listened to what Jessica said, wheels visibly turning in his head. It was exciting to think of a real place with her. A place he'd share with only her and whatever their future would hold. He'd no longer only have a room to call his own or no longer live in a place that his soulmate had traumatic experiences.

Number Two had tilted his head to a side, his eyes looking in the distance as if peering into the past. He wouldn't ever want a big house like the Hargreeve Mansion. A house filled with many things yet empty and cold. While a warehouse might give an industrial feel that could be considered the very thing he didn't want, Diego only felt the opposite with Jessica. He knew he'd work off whatever Danny helped them with.

"Rand can take care of the bottom floor and we can focus up top. The bottom would cover work and security of the whole place. Upstairs, just us." He quickly looked at Jessica with a bright, happy gaze.

"Just us," she agreed, fingers still tickling through his hair. She watched him take in the idea, mull it over, then saw when his gaze sharpened back on her. Those pretty dark eyes drew her in, and she found herself leaning in to give him a kiss, humming happily. "Probably best not to wear the suit for that. Some of them might be scrungy, and if you wear anything from Iron Crotch's closet, they might think we have more money than we do and try to fleece us. I'd prefer to underbid. And be sneaky."

They still swayed, but it was slower, more just a shadow of before as she brought her hand up to draw a line on his chin with her thumb. "We'll figure out what works best for us."

He enjoyed the soft kiss; both the contact and the happiness Jessica conveyed in it. Diego hummed back appreciatively. He chuckled softly at her attempt to save them money by running a game on the contractors. "I can just practice knife throwing and you can show them your skills at demo while we get the bid. Pretty sure they won't try to rake us over coals."

His forehead gently leaned in and rested against hers while still fixed on her gaze. "You know, we might be able to do a lot of work ourselves." He wasn't the handiest of handymen but Diego did get by fixing a few things at the gym to earn his keep along with sweeping floors.

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